Hey, before you pull yourself into this column first let me share with you it’s not about politics or religion — not about world strife and tragedy – this column is about love. So, like so many of you who find yourself brilliant, when related to politics, saved, when related to religion, and far away from the troubles of this world, perhaps you believe you have love so there is no need to read on. However, as the song goes “love isn’t something that we have - love is something that we do”.
Perhaps you do, but I can’t remember the first time I was told I was loved – I do remember the last for it was just minutes ago when my Chris left me to go shopping; her last parting words were, “I love you”. I’m sure I was told while in the womb I was loved – and I know I was told endlessly by both my dearest mom and dear dad – “Tommy, I love you.” But now, many, many years later, I am fully aware it’s not in the telling, rather love is “lived and given life” in the doing. In the doing, both of my parents lived life with me and my sister Honey always in their path, always in their heart, always attached to the destiny of their love.
I’ve loved and been loved for over 70 years and I know what a precious gift that has been and remains. I remember years ago sitting on my front porch with my dearest Mom in Kearny, N.J., she whispered to me, “Are you sure Tommy, sure you love her?”
I sat back placing my hands behind my head and replied,“Yes mom, I’m sure, Dorothy is going to be my girl.”
I was 10, in the third grade and in love for the first time in my life. I was asking my mom if it was alright to ask Dorothy to the school dance. Wow, was I in love, life is about love. Love doesn’t know time but time indeed does know love.
There is a “killer” of love, and indeed it’s time. Not the “time” of “space and time,” rather the effects of love not practiced and lived in the moment. These are the killers of love: the times you love yourself more than the other, the times your love is given only in return, the times your love is held back until a promise is made, and the times your love, present and active in another, is pulled away as a punishment. And there are many who love this way, pulling love out of “time.” Please don’t tell me you love your child if you’ve pulled out of their life, there is no more dishonor than pulling your love away from your child.
She followed me to the couch, I had asked her to please come and lay in my arms – I needed to simply hold her. Laying with her head resting on my chest I whispered, “Chris I love you!” She replied, “I love you too.” It was there and then that these words came into my mind and heart, “I will give you my heart faithful and true, and all the love it can hold that’s all I can do - because I’ve thought about how long I’ll love you, and it’s only fair that you know - forever’s as far as I’ll go.” Don’t know how much I love the South, but I know this, I love “Alabama.” Shhh – did you hear that, “I love you.” You are indeed lucky – life is about love.